Be aware when you and others become defensive. What are you defending? A story. Beliefs. And why are each of your stories so different that they need defending? For you have differing viewpoints. Yes, you might put yourself in their shoes. And there is another choice: you might view all points of view from your innate state of wholeness. From this viewpoint beyond the story, there is nothing to defend. And with that, yes, all the fight goes out of you and possibly even them, for there is no me/you/us/them from this sacred vantage point.

You are so very loved.